Film

The Man Who Stopped

A short film for Junior Productions, May 2017
"It were just a drizzly, humdrum | Market day in Lower Doldrum
The sellers sold, the shoppers shopped | But one man, well, this man just stopped..."

Wave – 0:32 mins

A promo for The Chop House comedy podcast, March 2012
- “I'm gonna do it. I'm doing it. You ready? Are you ready? Waaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaay!”
- "Just watch the f**king match!"

Tahiti Blue – First Draft Extract

The opening of an in-development script, March 2012
“This is it, Josh. Your golden opportunity. Your chance to take a break, go away, have some fun. Go do the thing you say you'll do every time you lose your job. Take that trip to Tahiti..."

Two Scots: Objects – 0:24 mins

A promo for The Chop House comedy podcast, February 2012
- “Donna was telling me how she keeps catching her man shagging the couch. And is no just the couch, either. Kitchen drawers, the video player, Henry Hoover: you name it, he shags it…”

Two Scots: Gym – 0:19 mins

A promo for The Chop House comedy podcast, February 2012
- "So I had this gym induction earlier. And the guy says to us ‘Why're you joining?’ So I says "I wanna get inta shape." Know what he says? "If you're going for a circle you're nearly there"..."

Two Scots: Man – 0:18 mins

A promo for The Chop House comedy podcast, February 2012
- "I says to him, "Look pal, I’m happy here, just leave us alone, will ya?", but he wasnae having none of it. He says to us "No man's an island Bonnie" so I says "What about the Isle of Man?"…”

Two Scots: Twat – 0:24 mins

A promo for The Chop House comedy podcast, February 2012
“She went "Can I just say... you’re a twat". So I said "No you cannae, it's not nice." An' she said "So can I think you're a twat?" So I said "I cannae stop ya". So she said "I think you're a twat"..."

A Glorious Death – Extract

The opening of an unpublished feature film script, May 2007
“My future was predictable. No, it was worse than that - it was certain. Identical train, identical job, identical woman. I dreamed of something new... but by what right? My life was perfect..."